Sunday, October 16, 2005

Internal Monologue

I am no fan in almost any sports.
In fact, I don't even exercise much.
The only kind of workout I prefer is actually running.. Funny that this is coming from a guy whom is severely overweight..
But yes, running is my cup of tea.
I do not run against anyone nor do I run with anyone.
Most times, I'd have the weird feeling that I have to run and off I go, in my running shoes.
Sometimes, I'd even go in the dead of the night, ie midnight hour.

Usually, the feeling of the need to run is often fueled by my having to buy new pants and realising nothing fits perfectly..... well, C'est La Vie.

Though I do not regularly run, I actually do enjoy my runs whenever I do it.
It gives me time to talk to myself. And No, at this point of time, if you are thinking I need to see a psychologist, my answer is "no". I do not need to pay someone thousands of dollars so that he can teach me how to reach my inner self. I already achieved that and that is through running.

Running gives me a space and time where I can really communicate with myself.
Well, firstly, I always tell myself the distance and time of the run and during the actual run, the 2 personalities of mine actually communicates to each other in order to fill the void and null the drudgery of the run.

It is amazing how much is achieved during the run, other than sweat and aching muscles.
Often, I have a clearer mind after each run on what I need to do in the weeks to come.
And at times, I even realised that my eyesight becomes better, well, maybe not because of the inner monologue, but there's more than one advantage of a run.

Like the advertisement of Nike, where 2 distinct personalities of the same person is being represented as 2 individuals. That is really happening when I run. Perhaps the breathlessness and the tiredness can really cause the mind to go cranky. But in my case, it gives the space for deep thoughts. Sometimes between the good and evil. At times between the past and present.

If you do see me running and my eyes are in a daze, most likely, I am engaged in a interesting conversation with myself.

Today is 16th October 2005
Time is 12:36pm

I just returned from a remedial physical training.
It was tiring but yet enriching to my mind and soul.

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